Mark Shagal

Love and Marriage

Some anthropologists once thought that romance was a Western idea, developed in the Middle Ages. Non-Western societies, they thought, were too occupied with social and family relationships for romance. Today, scientists believe that romance has existed in human brains in all societies since prehistoric times. In one study, for example, men and women from Europe, Japan, and the Philippines were asked to fill out a survey to measure their experiences of passionate love. All three groups said that they felt passion with the same extreme intensity.
But though romantic love may be universal, its cultural expression is not. To the Fulbe people of northern Cameroon, men who spend too much time with their wives are insulted and looked down on. Those who fall deeply in love are thought to have fallen under a dangerous spell. For the Fulbe, to be controlled by love is seen as shameful.
In India, marriages have traditionally been arranged, usually by the bride’s and groom’s parents, but today love marriages appear to be on the rise, often in defiance of parents’ wishes. The victory of romantic love is celebrated in Bollywood films. However, most Indians still believe arranged marriages are more likely to succeed than love marriages. In one survey of Indian college students, 76 percent said they would marry someone with all the right qualities even if they weren’t in love with the person. Marriage is considered too important a step to leave to chance.
But what is love? Does it exist in reality as an emotion, or is it just a chemical process, the desire to reproduce, the driving mechanism of our existence? Throughout history, mankind has deemed the heart the center of love. But scientists tell us love is all in our mind or brain. And it is fueled by chemicals and chemistry.
According to some researchers, love may be caused by chemicals in the body. Donatella Marazziti, a professor at the University of Pisa in Italy, has studied the biochemistry of...