Effects of Divorce Children

Divorce is an unfortunate event for any family, particularly those with children. Studies have shown that approximately 25% of children whose parents divorce suffer psychologically, socially, and academically at some point in their lives. For the most part, research on divorce focuses solely on divorce in the immediate aftermath, usually a two to five-year window, so nothing is set in stone. Nonetheless, it is crucial for parents who have decided on divorce to keep in mind that their separation is not only about them. Their children are in just as deep.

One major concern is that the children of divorce will come to the conclusion that their parents no longer love them. If one parent moves out, some children will assume responsibility for the separation and respond accordingly. Other children will feel abandoned and betrayed in some fashion, as though their parents have divorced them as well. Without any reassurance, these children may develop fears of abandonment. On occasion, the children involved are too young to understand the goings-on, but regardless of age, they need their parents to support them and their feelings to show them that they are not completely powerless.

Conflicts of loyalty can also come into play. Particularly if the divorce is messy and full of conflict, a child may feel obligated to choose a side. This can be extremely traumatic for children; they love both parents dearly and do not want to choose between them. Divorces are difficult for everyone involved, but divorces full of anger, resentment, and acts of spousal revenge can cause more harm to the child than anything. Children can find themselves caught in the middle of their parents’ battles, and they may wonder what part they play in the bigger picture.

Children need support systems. They thrive on structure and the stability offered by the individuals who raise them, giving them the security of certainty and predictability. When a young girl wakes up in the morning, she will...