Life

I really wanted to hang with you. I really wanted to talk to you. I wanted to spend my nights with you before I leave. I wanted to tell you the things I wanted to tell you. I wanted to ask you the questions I always wanted to tell you. I wanted to hear the truth from you. I really want to believe the words that come out of your mouth. But I can’t. Every time we do hang out with each other, we only play around. We tell each other jokes and stories. We don’t tell each other what’s on the inside. We look like little kids on the playground playing little games till one calls quits. We sit side by side but we never tell each other what’s going on with our lives. Even though we both say that “we’re both good friends” and “understand each other” very well, then how come we don’t tell each other our deepest feelings? How come we don’t tell each other our deepest thoughts? How come we don’t settle each others problems together? How come we don’t see each other on our downsides face to face? How come we don’t wipe each others tears when one cries? How come we never talk to each other on the phone for hours when one’s down? How come we are apart, our emotions are the exact opposite than when we are together? How come we don’t truly understand each other when we say we do? How come nothing is ever resolved? How come?! We say we “understand” each other but really we don’t. When we say to each other “you know me better than that” but do we really know each other that great? When we say that “you’re my best friend” to each other, how come we don’t act like we are? When people say that we look good together, then why in real life is it rare for us to be seen together? Why is everything so complicated between us? Why do I have a gut feeling that you lied to me? Why do I have a strong feeling that you made us live in a lie? Both in two different worlds of our own. On the same planet. On the same continent. In the same state. In the same town. Yet born into different ethnicities. We...