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Listening

  • Date Submitted: 09/23/2011 06:29 PM
  • Flesch-Kincaid Score: 70.5 
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My best friend and I had a discussion about her going with me to women’s group that I attend and speak at once a week.   The group is for women and they speak on women’s issues.   She said that she is not interested in what those groups are offering.   I know it will be a great for her and her family, they will provide many resources for her, a single mother with four girls and a grand son.   I felt it would be a great idea since she is always in need of something.

How did your understanding of the speaker's statement change after you used active listening?
It forced me to listen attentively to my best friend.
It allow me to avoid any misunderstandings, I had to confirm that I really understood what my best friend had said.
It opened the both of us up, to get us to say more.
We were not able to contradict one another since we knew when each other truly meant.

Did you find that the gap between your position and that of your partner narrowed as a result of active listening?

We just realized they we both will need to compromise on step out of our comfort zone.   It was better for me to compromise with her knowing how she truly felt and why.

How did you feel at the end of the conversation?   How does this feeling compare to your usual feeling after discussing controversial issues?

I did not feel the need to be defensive, and lash out, or withdraw from the conversation.   I was not left with the feeling of frustration either, as I have been in some of my past discussions.

How might your life change if you used paraphrasing at home?   At work?   With friends?

I am now realizing that when I paraphrase I demonstrate that I have truly understood the information well enough to put it into my own words.   When I paraphrase I am leaving no room for contradiction, but I am leaving more room for more information about the subject to be discussed by all parties, thus, permitting more thought before jumping to any conclusion.   I will be able to:
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