Calculatoy

1984 Propaganda Assignment – CALCULaTOY
Brought to you by alex, mark and winston
“Hey it’s [Name Classified], from the Ministry of Plenty, and Big Brother would like us to tell you about our new life-enhancing invention – the Calculatoy!”
“This all-new breakthrough in entertainment technology will have you spending hours trying out its incredible amount of features! Check this out: the Calculatoy doesn’t have 1 game, not 2 games, but 3 full games, each of them with hours of fun playing as high-ranking Party members and Oceanian soldiers fighting in Eurasia - wait… scratch that, Eastasia.”
“It can even calculate! Look at this!”
He types in 2+2 and gets 5.
“Big Brother says that the Calculatoy will eliminate thoughtcrime and that if everyone buys at least one Calculatoy, the chocolate ration will increase to 10 grammes per week! Isn’t the Calculatoy incre-“
Screen blurs. Goldstein’s face is shown.
“Do not buy the Calculatoy! It will make you love Big Brother even more than you do now.”
Goldstein’s head explodes and Big Brother’s head replaces it. He stares out of the telescreen for a while. Scene shifts back to narrator.
“The Proles are too primitive to understand just how fun the Calculatoy is. Here we will show you what happens when we give a Calculatoy to a Prole.”
Scene shifts to Prole neighborhood and a Party member walks up to a Prole with a Calculatoy and hands it to him.
“What’s this? I don’t get it.”
“It’s the Calculatoy! The Calculatoy is a new invention created by the Ministry of Plenty, and Big Brother loves it!”
Prole clicks a few buttons.
“It just isn’t fun, no matter how much I play it.”
“Are you sure, Big Brother highly encourages the Calculatoy?”
“Yes I’m sure, it just isn’t fun.”
Two men in black come out of nowhere and take the Prole away. Scene shifts back to narrator again.
“Big Brother has found that everybody who buys a Calculatoy is loyal to the Party! Therefore, anybody who hasn’t...